How stupid is Donald Trump?

Donald Trump.

Now, wait. I'm not going into some rant about his latest fucknurdlery, or spin off into a diatribe about what a bunglecunt the man is, I just want to posit a theory.

Let's just say, for the sake of argument, that Donald Trump, Republican nominee, presumptive President of the United States (bear with me), isn't actually as stupid, racist or indeed rich as he makes out.

Let's start with wealth. Who's actually funding his campaign? He says he is, but this self-funding idea is a bit of a misnomer. He has certainly put money into his own campaign; money that has paid back his own interests (use of his own private jet, staying in his own hotels, that sort of thing); money given as a loan, therefore hardly a payment more of a savings plan. He'll pay himself back later out of party funds, presumably. (Fact check - http://www.politifact.com/truth-o-meter/statements/2016/feb/10/donald-trump/donald-trump-self-funding-his-campaign-sort/). There are also rumours that he has received money for his campaign from companies funded by Russian interests, and specifically billionaires linked to Putin. Now, I emphasise "rumours", as they are, as yet, unconfirmed. But since he appears to placing a lot of faith in rumours as part of his campaign policy it does seem fair to highlight them here. So, let's not even go down the Chinese route, right?

Is he a racist? Well, once upon a time we looked at an unethical, white misogynist banging on about a bloke called Khan as a bit of light relief (Captain James Tiberius Kirk, if anyone needs a hint). Now, he's running for president. The fact that he refuses to denounce supremacist groups of any persuasion and possibly even accepts funding from some of them (allegedly, not proved, no button pushing please), and that they all appear to be white could mean a surprising amount. Or nothing. I'm just putting it out there. In fact, he's only really being racist about Mexicans, the whole of South America, Central Asia, the Middle and the Far East and anyone who doesn't agree with him. Damn! The man is an equal opportunities racist! Is there no end to his evil?

But wait, there is the third facet to his character that I wish to discuss. And this is the one bit that makes me wonder. Is he really stupid?

Hillary Clinton - or as the Donald likes to call her, Killary, The Devil, the witch - is not exactly "clean". She's been party to some pretty heinous voting (Iraq, welfare), scandal (emails/husband) and decision-making over the years, along with all her other political colleagues at one time or another. But she has form in politics. She knows the political system. She understands global economics, finance, international issues, domestic issues, state and national legislation - you know, the basics!

Trump is reputed to have said something along the lines of "I won't need to know about any of that, I'll have people, real people, the best people. You know, the sort of people who people tell things to. They'll tell me about what's going on and I'll make the decision, the right decision, the best decision based on these great people's recommendations. Unless I don't want to. And then I won't. Because I'll be President and America will be great again. Greater. The best. Ever. No messing. It's true. Like, the real truth only better." I'm paraphrasing a little and punctuating.

Just recently, however, Trump's outbursts have become ever more grandiose, exaggerated, personal, vitriolic, violent, accusatory, vicious. Louder. So, here's where I reckon he's maybe not quite as stupid as he has presented himself to be.

Last year, when he announced his candidacy, people thought it was a joke. Well, the joke is on everyone. However, what if it wasn't supposed to go that way? What if he thought it might just be fun; spend some money, write it off against tax, be the big man in the limelight, make some waves, get people to notice him on the main world stage, make some money and more of a name for himself as a bit of a Vegas "player" and then disappear - or whatever "disappear" might actually mean to him? But he got caught up in something. Something even bigger than his own ego. And he liked it. He liked the attention. People weren't just listening to him in the boardroom, they were listening to him all over the world. And some of them were agreeing with him. And he REALLY liked that! And he got carried away; carried away on the spectacle, the emotion, the possibilities, the attention.

 Then, he wasn’t just a candidate. He was the Republican nominee. Amid all the lights and name calling, the belligerent battle cries against Muslims, Mexicans and Clintons, he was suddenly in a situation where he might genuinely become the President of the United States. And suddenly it got real. No games. No all night pool parties with senior diplomats. Shit just got serious and, rather than scared, I think Trump faced a realisation. He would not be a good President. He would, in fact, be the absolute worst kind of president. Not just nationally but internationally. And so he started to look for an exit strategy. The more ostentatious his remarks, the more violent and absurd his outbursts, the more dangerous his rhetoric would become, the less likely the rest of the nation would vote for him. Not stupid, see? Just trying to get out of something that had got too big and too real, but do it in a way that people now expect of him. Finally making himself unelectable by being even more of the person people think he is!

So, in conclusion, Trump may not actually be stupid. Well, he is, obviously, but he’s trying.

That’s the kind, sympathetic, it’s all for the greater good bit that this was all about.

In reality, he’s tapped into a vein of horror from which the world may struggle to recover. And if Trump is genuinely a stupid, rich, racist with a global megaphone, those who believe in him, support him and champion him are even scarier for wanting him to lead them.

But hey, my country just voted to leave Europe and is performing political cannibalism on itself. Go us, go US, go UK! Or just go to Canada. Please Justin, can I come in? I’ll be nice. Honest.

Could we, maybe, just be a bit nicer to each other?

Inspired by our irrepressibly noisome Parliament’s status of being anti everything the other lot says and Zac Goldsmith’s pathetic smear tactics in the Mayoral Election playground. WARNING, I wrote this so expect utopian ideals and generalisations.

How can we teach our children not to bully or be judgemental or hurtful, spiteful, rude, greedy, negligent, selfish, angry, suspicious or mean, when so much of our media, from magazine to broadcast and tabloid to social media, is given to reporting exactly that so often it has become normal? The leaders and politicians we should be able to look to for guidance and direction no longer see good, just what they can attack. (e.g. Labour agreeing with the Government on staying in the EU, but refusing to say they actually think the government is right about that, rather they just attack the methods and procedures. Just say you agree with the premise but not the detail. Start from a positive then debate the rest!)

In the face of all that, how do we teach our children tolerance and understanding, inclusion and openness and give them a chance for empathy, friendship and awareness of others and their surroundings? This is not some liberalist battle cry (God forbid, it would be more of a meek murmur!) but instead a reason for globalisation; true globalisation – not the bastardised, purely capitalist “let’s just create a market and shit on anyone who disagrees while fleecing them for every penny and destroying cultures and people because they aren’t financially valuable enough to keep” movement that it has been. It should be an opportunity for people all over the world to see each other as people, not as an ideology to be feared and bombed or a policy to be bitterly fought just because it came from someone wearing a red tie not a blue one.

Why has it even got that far? For true globalisation everyone needs to behave in a decent manner, not like a greed-driven robot.  But then, I’m one of those wishy washy, meritocratic, liberal-champagne-socialists who likes trees and wine and people and the environment.

Is it too much, then, to ask that we stop trying to fight everything?

Wouldn't it be interesting if, for just one day, the whole world just stopped fighting, had a cup of tea and got to know each other? Yeah, the utopian ideal. Nah, fuck it, let’s just bomb the shit out of everything. 

Because that’s worked so well up to now.

We have so much to be proud of and there is so much good being done all over the world. Let’s promote that for a change. And not simply because a celebrity is running a million miles on a hamster wheel, smearing themselves in palm oil and drinking carbonated Amazon water - laudable and applaudable, though that is - but because people do good stuff all the time!

I’m off to walk in the grass and hug trees. Or drink a lot of wine. Maybe both. But I’m not going to rip someone’s heart out through their eyes because they don’t agree with the way I wear my hat. My shoes, on the other hand, well now, that's a different story!

Scum and cream both rise to the top. You just need to work out how to skim. Even scum can fertilise. 

We cannot do this any more. So what can we do?

This started as an essay about the benefits black hole and how we should be utterly ashamed of our government. But as I wrote, I found there was more to consider. So I did. But I haven't gone as far as perhaps I might, simply because I'm not writing a book, I'm writing a blog. 

Now, here’s a thing. 

I genuinely believe that if you can work, you should work! This, obviously requires there to be work available that pays a living wage and removes the need for benefits. I just thought I’d throw that out there. But there’s more.

I have a question.

Since we are being told that our huge budget deficit requires enormous, sweeping cuts to public spending, how much will be enough?

There are all sorts of figures being bandied about; £20 billion worth of cuts required from June 2015, on top of a currently undisclosed figure since 2011; £12 billion on welfare alone; multiple billions to be cut from public service, pensions, parts of the welfare bill. But in all this, there has been no definite figure. Much has been said about cutting the deficit; but cutting it to what and in relation to what? Modern day Governments run on deficit. Depending on how you interpret national budgets, debt is how governments fund themselves, either by owing or being owed – taxation, loans, investment in debt.

The arbitrary nature of the statement, “cutting the deficit”, requires no final figure, therefore leaving the abuse of those who require public funding to survive open to extremes, hence the absolute evil of Osborne’s austerity plans.

Would it not be better to simply come out and say that as far as conservatives are concerned, if you are sick, disabled, unable to work, or simply claiming any form of benefit you would be better off dead. God forbid you should be considered a cost to the country. No one wants to hear it, but it’s not going to make anyone like or hate the conservative government any more. To use language that an Osborne or a Duncan Smith can understand it’s nothing more than semantics, really. It’s pretty much the same as using the word “immigrant” to label anyone who isn’t indigenous but must be considered inferior to the indigenous people. Just semantics. However, consider this. Since Ian Duncan Smith’s DWP reforms have taken hold and the various schemes for removing public spending on disability have been enacted either via ATOS or Maximus, over 3,000 people have died - 2,380 people died in the first 6 weeks after the initial assessments were carried out. A fact that IDS and the “Conservative Management Team” did not want to acknowledge. It’s impossible not to consider the possibility that, for all that the changes are being couched in terms of managing efficiencies and debt, they are also tantamount to a cull. I know that’s a harsh thing to say, but if you’re not alive to claim benefit that you would otherwise be entitled to, the DWP doesn’t have to pay you, so, to them, it’s a saving – especially since that money can be counted against the Osborne-required cuts.

So, what of managing efficiencies? There are those who have been on benefits for a long time, who, perhaps, shouldn’t be; able bodied, capable people of working age and acceptable health who would rather do nothing and receive housing, income and child benefits, meagre though they may be. None of us like that idea. Actually, I’ll come right out and say it again, if you can work, you should work – assuming availability of employment and a living wage.

Certain media outlets would have us believe that they are in the majority, these heinous excuses for people sponging and scrounging worthlessly from the State, living in council houses surrounded by flat screen televisions, branded trainers, games consoles and tickets to far flung holiday destinations. The truth is very, very different. For 2012/13, benefit fraud stood at between £1.2 and £1.6 billion, depending on whose figures you prefer to employ. That sounds horrendous, but is actually LESS than 1% of the total overall benefits and tax credits expenditure of the UK. According to figures from the Department of Work And Pensions (Ian Duncan Smith’s own “personal” empire) some people didn’t actually receive what they were entitled to. When I say some, I mean enough to total an underpayment of benefit to the tune of £1.4 billion. That’s pretty bad, especially when you consider that, officially, an estimated 30% of those errors (both in overpayments and underpayments) were as a result of “official errors”.  So, either benefit fraud was less than the underpayments or very marginally more. Scary thoughts. The government actually lost nothing. Really. In fact, it may even have made money on those underpayments.

I’ll leave that for now.

We have a government that champions its businesses not its people. That’s why we have a disparity between the minimum wage and the living wage. How that is even possible, I cannot begin to accept. However, we are forced to listen to the “poor” business owners who claim their wage bills will increase exponentially if they have to pay more than the minimum wage – about which many are griping anyway – thus making their products more expensive and causing them to be less competitive. So, what would they consider the correct price for their product? A price that makes them competitive in external markets but will eventually bankrupt them because they would not be able to continue providing those goods at that price, or a price that reflects the costs of the country in which that product is made?

I find it difficult to justify not paying someone a living wage. That’s like saying “we’ll put plastic joists in this building because they’re cheaper than steel. They’ll crack and collapse, potentially killing people, but they’re cheaper.” Pay people a living wage and they can afford to come off benefits, pay taxes, buy goods – maybe even your goods – at prices that reflect the cost of the country and the manufacture of those goods (e.g milk, chicken, honey, clothing in the UK). That’s the thing about living in a so-called developed economy. It is more expensive than living in a developing one.

But I’m getting off the point in order to emphasise the point I’m making.

We have a huge benefits bill in this country. We have an enormous public spending requirement, of which benefit payments are just a tiny proportion. But to attack the weakest, those who genuinely require help, who cannot live without assistance is utterly abhorrent.

This is why I want to consider the shame of having allowed a government to come to power that has the destruction of the welfare system at its core, not that it would ever admit to it. I can’t help but feel anger when I read that people are being told that, despite needing 24 hour care, they should wear incontinence pants so that their inability to control their bowel movements didn’t prevent them from working. These are human beings who require our help and our care not objects for degradation, humiliation and disposal. And not targets for blame.

Mr Duncan Smith, Mr Osborne, Mr Cameron, you don’t see what you’re doing because you don’t want to. I want to believe that you started on your quest for megalomaniacal glory from a point of principled politics; that you wanted to serve the nation in which you live, the society and communities into which you were born. I want to believe that. I don’t. I believe that your only reason for staying in power is to perpetuate the power of the few. Genuine politicians, genuine people with real passion for their environment and their people scare you.

I am ashamed that we put this government in power. But I am also ashamed that we were left with no choice after a succession of greed-orientated power mongers from Thatcher to Blair to Cameron. Of course we need strong businesses to build a strong economy, but if that is only to promote the greed and financial growth of a tiny minority, what good is it to the country? What good does it ultimately do?

Change will come, because it will have to. We cannot continue like this because it will ultimately lead to our destruction, either in a return to serfdom and slavery, or revolution and mass destruction. There are better options:

1/ Understand the need for an economy to be of benefit to a nation. You cannot champion one facet of a society and claim it’s making things better when it is actually destroying the society itself. Tax relief for non-dom companies must cease. Opportunities for tax avoidance must be blocked. That’s how you fill the deficit. (Banking, foreign business, housing investment)

2/ Treat those who require help with respect, dignity and care, not brutalisation, demonisation and humiliation. We are a nation of people who do care about each other, our families, our neighbours and our friends. And as we perpetuate a society that cares for itself, so we in turn become stronger. (Welfare, NHS)

3/ Teach people that greed is not the ultimate glory. Education is the most dangerous thing to a government intent on control. The more we educate ourselves and the generations to follow, the better chance we have to develop understanding, tolerance, care and beneficial growth, without the ultimate need to own everything. What a challenge that would be for marketing and advertising agencies: transfer your knowledge of and skill for creating need for the unnecessary to generating need for what is actually good, beneficial, peaceful, caring and long term. Garner a shift from “what can I have, I want that!” to “what can I give? I can help!” (Education, involvement in society/community programmes)

You know what, if I can see these things, then so can those in power. And if they see it and do nothing about it, then they have made their choice. I don’t believe it’s the choice we want. I do believe in us. I do believe in a UK. I do believe in people. I do believe we can change the way our nation works. But we need to be led by those who see opportunity that isn’t simply based on a bottom line.

For the Conservatives to care so little about those who need the most care, is vile and destructive. It's evil. It's hateful. It must be stopped. 

Please get out there and read Manifestos and pamphlets, articles and comment. Listen to as much of the media as you can stand. Then make your own mind up. I don’t expect you to agree with what I’ve said, I'm not sure I even want you to because I want to learn, too, but if we start with debate, we genuinely have a chance to make educated decisions. And I really look forward to that. 

(Inspired by the Chicago Boys, Iceland, the banking crisis and the fraudsters' escape, Ian Duncan Smith, inherent human greed and evil, the incredible resourcefulness of humanity and a belief in good.)

We can be so much more (or the Health of the Nation)

Everyone's calling for a vote of no confidence in, or the sacking of, Jeremy Hunt. While I applaud the sentiment, I'd like to point out that it's not him, on his own, doing this. He is the figurehead, the target for the rest of us who despise what HE is doing to our NHS. But calling for David Cameron and the Conservative Party to remove the person who is publicly fronting the policies that they have set in place is unlikely to garner support from them. I'm sorry to be blunt, but they won't get rid of him. They need him exactly where he is, whether WE like it or not. 

Since the brakes were removed from this government's freedom to do whatever the damn hell they want since we voted them in as the party of majority, they have done exactly that, exactly what they want. Although we may feel it is not our individual fault because maybe we didn't vote for the conservatives, as a Nation we did.

The Labour Party is a toothless, battered bag of rags which needs support and leadership - none of which it has in worthwhile quantities or qualities. The Lib Dems, the Greens have nothing but a quiet voice of semi-sense to offer, but are seen as having absolutely no back bone. And, really, do you want an invertebrate standing up for you? You'd have to hold them! Which is tough when you're struggling to hold yourself upright in the face of the torrential rain, earthquakes and hurricanes directed at you from Westminster. 

Currently, the only party with any teeth in opposition to the government is the SNP – which is not a National party for the UK. Still, it is represented in Westminster with a vast haul of MPs and thankfully they have the voices to make their stand. They stand for Scotland, but what they stand for is UK-wide, whether you agree wholeheartedly with their policies or not. But even the SNP have been published in a less than glowing light. 

The government has done a fantastic job of nullifying the "threat" from other parties, and in no small part because they haven't had to do anything. The other parties have successfully damaged themselves to such an extent that we may fear supporting them en masse, in case we just shout into the wind. But unfortunately, that's almost all we can do. Or at least, that’s how it seems.

Our efforts to petition, march against, block, stop or otherwise prevent appallingly damaging national policies from taking hold can only work with a significantly improved support structure for the opposition, not just, albeit temporarily powerful, passionate individual groups. Our victories seem like drops in an ocean of dissatisfaction as we are bulldozed into acquiescence and forced acceptance.

How we galvanise ourselves into action is the issue. We can accept the Devil we know and force ourselves to live under the thumb and at the whim of corporations, or we can use the next 5 years as a real chance to make our feelings known and drive our own National agenda; one of community, society, safety, health, education, environment that steps away from the pre-ordained, money-driven bottom line economics and puts the onus on society – because, whether the Thatcher clones of DC, GO and IDS want to accept it or not, SOCIETY does exist.

This does not, for one minute, suggest that finance is not important. But believing in it as the only meaningful facet in a society is derogatory to the people of this nation and utterly devalues us as a people. We are so much more than money, even if the words we use to describe ourselves and our contribution to each other’s lives is financial. But it is up to us to make those differences our values, our worth.

Yes, this means that we do look after our own. Yes, it does mean keeping an eye out for those who might need help. Yes, it does mean putting ourselves “out”. We have become so self-centred as a Nation and as individuals that the very idea of doing anything that takes us out of our comfort zones is to be shunned and hidden, buried as deeply as we can, so that we don’t have to think of it again. This is not to say that we shouldn’t be clammering at Parliament’s door to change taxation laws, stop cutting aid/benefits to those who really do need them, block the damaging elements of TTIP which will give corporations power over international governments and sovereign states. It does mean doing it from a different stance.

I’m not talking from the point of view of someone who already does all this. I don’t. I have changed the way I behave in my community and am more involved than I once was, but I’m not a saint nor am I a drum banger. I’m as lazy or as busy, as helpful or as selfish as anyone else. Yes, I do get involved in some things that others don’t, because that’s the way I feel about them. Could I do more? Yes. Will I do more? Having written this, I’d bloody well better, hadn't I!

I am a city dweller, a Londoner. I am also a member of a community, a neighbour, a friend, a family member. I can’t help everyone all the time, but in my community I can help to make a difference. It’s not a case of saying I must give every second of my time outside of work to help other people. We need time for ourselves and with our families. That’s not the point. It’s more about deciding to be involved in your community in a beneficial way; whether that’s joining your local area society, having a voice at council meetings, joining the social club and chatting to people who might otherwise be lonely, or even something as simple as talking to your neighbours and listening, informing yourself and learning about your local area. Sometimes you won't agree with what people say, but that's not actually a bad thing. It really isn't. 

By creating, developing, being involved with and strengthening our local communities, we DO create a stronger society, regardless of what those in power believe. And as a stronger society we can speak with a bigger, stronger, more powerful, more eloquent voice that is not as easy to shut out as if we were simply individuals shouting at the wind!

To stop a hurricane doing damage, you must build a structure with the foundations to hold firm. To stop an earthquake, you must build your structures with tolerance and flex.

We are hitting a point now, where the hurricane is picking at the strongest points of our society and creating weaknesses, not just exploiting them: education, health, transport are all in the firing line because they are seen as too expensive. And it wouldn't matter whether they were functioning without problems, utterly brilliantly and totally safely, the bottom line will always require scrutiny. That's the nature of finance. Yet without education, health and transport, the cost to us, as a Nation, would be incalculable. We are the nation we are because of what we have achieved, not what has beaten us.

How we come together, either as supporters of a political ideology or as individuals with a shared passion, need, love or cause, doesn’t matter. But complaining will only get us so far. We need to do more than complain but it doesn’t need to be a violent revolution. Our strength as individuals grows exponentially as a community and a society.

If you’re happy with what’s happening now, good for you. I won’t insult you or shout at you. You’ve made your choice. But if you’re not happy with what you see around you and the future you see for yourself, your children, your families, your friends, your community, your nation, then you have the right to do something about it.

We can shout as much as we like, but the worst thing we can do is nothing. And the moment we start, imagine the strength we might have. Imagine our pride in ourselves and our Nation. Imagine the society we could live in. 

M.Y. 21/07/2015

TTIP - the destructive power of corporation vs Nation

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-30493297

A very clear explanation of the much vaunted capitalist benefits compared to the social destruction of working rights, pay and conditions.

It doesn't quite go far enough, focussing almost exclusively on the reaction towards the treatment of the NHS, but TTIP will, if taken on board across Europe, make every state owned/run industry a target for corporate greed in a freely accessible market place regardless of the effect on millions of HUMANS(!) and there will be nothing that the individual nations can do to stop it, without facing hugely expensive and damaging legal battles. TTIP will actually lead to nations being sued by corporations for the right to dismantle society and culture. This is not the golden egg Cameron and the coin-cronies would have us believe, unless all that you want is to line your own pockets and sod everyone else. For all that the Green Party statement may be grandstanding and soundbiting, it's terrifyingly true. I really hope this doesn't go through.

But then I hope they quash the "relaxation" of hunting laws and bin fracking. Unfortunately, rather like any team I get behind when they're playing on the TV, I reckon my support is ultimately massively damaging. But I just can't bring myself to support TTIP, hunting or fracking or Trident or Nazis or IS or pure, unfettered, anti society, community-destructive capitalism.

The Chicago boys are still running rampant.

Triumph Sprint ST 1050 (The Floozy) 2007 model

A long term review, originally written for a website. But I thought I'd have it back for a bit.

The Triumph Sprint ST 1050

I like Triumphs. I think I always have. One of the first "new" bikes I ever really lusted after was the 955i Sprint from 2001. That's, obviously, after I'd fallen for the America, the Classic, the Bonneville and all the others, too. But I'd never had much of a chance to ride them. I'd been too keen on japanese models - Suzuki, Yamaha, Honda. But the 2001 955i just stuck in my brain. And my heart. I dreamt that one day I'd have one. A sapphire blue mile muncher with an adventurer's heart and thrill seeker's passion for speed. And in February 2007, I realised that dream. There it was. My very own, sapphire blue, 2001 Triumph Sprint ST 955i. In my garage! And for 3 years, I never even looked at another bike. I pampered her religiously. I took her to The Loire and to Bruges, to Amsterdam and Norwich (all the romantic places). I lavished love, affection and accessories on her. And I cried like a baby when she spilt her guts all over the road round Lewisham roundabout in South East London, firing her piston bolts into searing metal and expiring before my eyes. I would never, ever find another. Nothing would ever be that good again. Nothing could be so visceral, so exciting, so…

...hang on… what's that over there? A 2007 Triumph Sprint ST 1050, you say? And I can have a test ride, can I? Can I have it? The bike, I mean. All you want is money? That's all? Surely you need part of my soul?

And so, in August 2010 The Floozy (named by my wife, in case you're wondering) came home with me. Bright lipstick red, matching panniers, heated grips, 6,000 miles on the clock, crash bungs, factory-fitted alarm, single-sided swing-arm, that triple exhaust booty, head turning as standard - a real fire cracker.

I loved the 955i's riding position. It felt like you were one with the bike, as though you were in it not on it. (oo-er misses). And then along came The Floozy. I could continue with the double entendres but I'll leave them to your imagination. The Sprint ST is a long distance bike, so don't expect to be crouched over like you would be on a pure sports bike. It's a little more upright. The difference between the 955 and the 1050 may only have been a few millimetres but the feeling was much more involving. The pedals were a little lower, the bars a little closer. You still got the feeling that you were sitting rather than practically lying down, but this is still as close to a perfect hybrid as you can get without being a dedicated sports machine. Just with more comfort. And yet, it lost none of its touring class. It just looked sharper, sleeker, more angles than curves, yet still ogle-worthy.

So let’s get the numbers out of the way, this is, after all, an owner’s review, rather than a test.

The 1050cc in-line triple engine grunts out 125bhp over 6 gears and just hums or growls whenever you want. And with it all comes that unmistakable whistle of the triple. Where many of the Japanese bikes have an indistinguishable pop soundtrack, Ducatis and Harley’s have their signature theme tunes and so does a Triumph triple. It’s a good thing.

I was tapped on the shoulder by a motorbike cop while standing at a red light one morning on the way to work and all he said was “nice bike. It’s a missile! Take it easy and enjoy.” Like I was going to do anything else. But it made me smile as I heaved a sigh of relief that I hadn’t been collared doing something naughty. He’s right though. If you give it a handful, the Sprint’s reaction is very quick. I mean, very quick. On a rideout one evening, one of my co-bikers asked me if the difference between the 1050 and 955 was really that great. When I asked him why, he just said that rapid progress really looked easy on the 1050. Read into that what you will, but you do need to keep a lid on it. It’s very easy to overdo it.

It didn’t take long to get used to the change in position, the feel and feedback from the very responsive brakes and suspension. It’s a very involving bike and yet still comfortable and relaxing. When you point and shoot it goes like a rocket, but I don’t get much of a chance to do that. And certainly not outside of a track day environment. Most of my riding over the last few years has been commuting and the odd long trip round Britain or over to France.

I’ll start with the commuting side of things. The reach to the bars is a comfortable stretch if you’re quite tall. I’m 6’1” and I do have to lean a bit. This, inevitably puts weight through your wrists and if you’re filtering, it can be hard work. I say filtering, but at about 210 kilgrammes without luggage it’s more like manhandling your way through traffic; especially heavy, rush hour traffic in major cities. But with the seat as low as it is (I’ve not had it raised from the factory spec 81cm), I can put my feet flat on the ground with slightly bent legs so the feeling of security at a standstill is absolute. As is the balance. It’s a beautifully balanced machine and even at walking pace you still feel in complete control. And when I say walking pace I mean that kind of granny-on-a-zimmer sort of pace or, as Londoners like to call it, high speed commuting.

Double disc brakes on the front and a single on the rear are really good. I use EBC’s Double-H sintered stoppers and have done for years. They’re very responsive and the Triumph’s ABS is more of a comfort than a necessity, although it has proved itself very useful on a couple of occasions. That, too, can take a little getting used to as it feels like it stops you from using the brakes the way you want to. But you do get used to it.

This is where I am also very glad of my Road Pilot 3 tyres. Their grip is outstanding, even from cold (although, obviously, don’t push it), they’ve survived thousands of miles and seem to hold up to the road wear really well. Although I’ve had to replace several because of punctures, it’s rarely been down to wear, just tear. Currently, both front and rear have done more than 5k each and the rear is carrying two puncture repairs!

Riding any bike through commuter traffic in an urban environment is hard work and despite its balance and control, its easy, responsive gearing, it’s a heavy bike. Yet it really comes into its own when you hit the bigger roads.

Longer rides are a joy. Whether you’re touring, scratching or bimbling along this has become my dreamtime. Where aborigines go walkabout, I turn left off a main highway and find countryside with National speed limits and twists, turns, hills and valleys. If you want to clamber all over it round corners, you can. If you want to let it take the strain and just sit there loving the feeling of stability and easy speed, the comfort and visibility riding singly or with a pillion, this is the perfect bike. I spend a lot of time riding with a pillion and my wife is a huge bike fan. If you want proof of the comfort, we have done a number of long, motorway and countryside trips both in Britain and abroad (notably the odd 3 day blast to Amsterdam, Brussels and Luxembourg) spending many hours in the saddle. And apart from the usual “sitting in the same position for hours” grumbles, the bike has been amazingly comfortable. And that’s with the standard seat.

Luggage is quick and very simple to load and unload and doesn’t detract from the look of the bike, in my opinion. If you don’t want it there, it’s not. If it’s there, it does a job. Simples.

As far as accessories go, I’ve now fitted heated grips and a scott-oiler because, basically, I’m getting older and I like to keep my hands warm and I don’t like bending down to oil the chain! The heated grips have been a godsend and the scottoiler keeps maintenance to a minimum. It also extends chain life by keeping it properly lubed preventing stretch and uneven wear. I really would recommend one, especially if you do lots of miles.

All I’ve done is rave about how good it is, I know. But then I wouldn’t have kept it for 4 years if I didn’t love it. There are, however, a couple of negative points.

The nitty and gritty of riding this sort of bike comes down to the costs of servicing and maintenance. It’s not cheap. On a couple of occasions I’ve been forced down the credit card route rather than a debit card. If anything does go wrong, it’s expensive! But in the 4 years that I’ve had the bike, I’ve done over 24,000 miles. I’ve had it serviced every 6k which works out about £300 per service (oils, pads, filters and any sundries). This has all been through Carl Rosner in Sanderstead near Croydon. They’ve been fantastic with any queries and the’ve kept the bike running beautifully. I can’t say enough about their attention to detail and customer service, which is why I keep going back to them and handing over my money.

I’ve also had trouble with the position of the factory alarm connections. In fact, whenever I wash the bike I have to set it to service mode because otherwise water gets into the electrics and sets the alarm off. The guys at Carl Rosner have packed the unit in all sorts of waterproof coverings, but it still happens. It may be how the electric connections are positioned but it’s something I can live with. My neighbours are another story, though, especially when they see the hose!

All in all though, I am one very happy bike owner. And it’s down to the Sprint ST 1050. It suits me, my needs, my wants and my search for thrills on the road and the track. And that’s pretty much all I could ask for.

So, a quick recap. 4 years, 26000 miles, £££s spent, 7 countries visited, 7 tyres, several sets of brake pads, 1 change of chain and sprockets and a couple of very handy accessories. Funny how they get under your skin, into your heart and control your life isn’t it?

Love bike. Love biking. Happy.

M

The Need For Speed Gets Brakes!

There's that awful moment in some peoples' lives when an unbidden, official letter pops through the letterbox and lands with the weight of a thousand traffic cops on the shattered remains of a once unblemished driving record.

I am that person; that awful, hateful, hated person who believed themselves to be a better driver than most - although obviously not the best, that would be arrogant and conceited; that person who tuts at middle-lane hoggers and Sunday drivers and high speed racers; that person who pities and belittles Audi drivers and their broken indicators (it's not just me, is it? None of them work!); who bemoans the rudeness of others, the lack of care, the lack of observation, the lack of understanding, the lack of sharing.

I am also that person who did 42mph in a 30mph zone. After going through 3 villages on a National Speed Limit road in Cambridge at below 30mph - because that's the law! - and accelerating back to 60mph on leaving each one, I assumed the presence of a National Speed Limit sign as I exited the 4th village, only to be confronted by a camera. As I accelerated. Into what I thought was a 60mph zone. I'm sure I looked serenely happy on the photograph taken of me, believing that I was conforming to road conditions rather than stereotype - not that there is a stereotype where speeding is concerned. There isn't.  Your background, age, education, profession mean nothing. We're human. And sometimes we make mistakes.

It matters not. I had not been concentrating. If I had, I would have seen that there was a slightly tighter bend, that visibility was not great because of the trees and shrubs, that there was a hazard line in the middle of the road (the lengthened white line), that there was a camera immediately after the road narrowing furniture.

After nearly 30 years with a clean licence, pulled over once 15 years ago by a very bored policeman at 3 o'clock in the morning after a 6 hour drive to London from Newcastle to have a finger wagging session about doing 31 in a 30 zone, I had received the dreaded "Notification of Naughtiness!" And it was probably about time. Although I never considered  myself to be an "habitual speeder" I had probably been more wary of speed cameras, police cars and camera vans than I cared to admit. In fact, and I don't think I'm alone here and certainly not among people of my age and sex (I'm talking middle aged man, here), I may be able to have counted myself lucky that I had not been "done" before.

The offer was simple. 3 points on my licence for the first time ever and a fine, or 100 of my finest British pounds and a National Speed Awareness Course with AA Drivetech via which I kept my licence clean. There was no point arguing that it wasn't me, that it wasn't fair. It was me. It was fair. That was that.

So, I joined 24 other reprobates to discover the error of my ways. I also discovered that most of them had been caught doing a lot less than I had been, which was sobering in its own right.

I was expecting to be spoken to like an errant child or lambasted for my flagrant disregard for safety and the lives of others, held up as a danger and ridiculed for my stupidity and selfishness. I couldn't have been more wrong. The two course leaders were open, friendly, easy-going and chatty. Bryan Lennox and Aadam Malik weren't there to tell anyone off or make anyone feel bad. They were there to educate. That was it. We can all say that we know all this and we're all aware of the illegality and that we won't do it again. But if that was the case, we wouldn't be there in the first place, would we? It's an awareness course, not detention. And for all that some of the people on the course may have wanted to make a statement or attempt to state their case as if they were on trial, the whole point was that everyone would leave with a better understanding of the reasons behind speed limits and what to look for to inform our driving.

It's amazing what you miss when you look out of your window. Do you see that guy on the corner, the one who's always there? Did you notice that his shoes are a bit shabbier today and that his trousers are dirty? Can you see the shop on the end has changed its display - there are now 4 cakes on the shelf, not the usual 2? Do you see the zig zag lines near the traffic lights? Did you see the yellow lines on the side of the road, were they single or double… were they red? Did you see the girl in the short skirt, the guy in the sharp suit, THAT CHILD!

There are many reasons why we speed, but all of them are under our control, and one of the main things I will take from this course is the knowledge that I'm the one in control. If you're angry, take a breath. If you're tired, take a break or take it easy. If you're late, just be late. It's up to you to smile, sleep, leave a bit earlier. These are just examples, and they're exactly like the pressure that you might feel from other drivers to go faster. There's a reason for the speed limits in the UK. You might not think they're important, fair or even safe, you may have someone right on your tail, you might think your skill as a driver surpasses the road conditions or even your vehicle. (How many times have you heard someone say "my car/bike's so much more capable than I am". I know it's a joke, but you're in charge of it!) For all that bravado, we are all human. We all make mistakes.

This course is a refresher for the things you know but don't consider anymore. It's a reminder about the value of knowing the Highway Code. It's an education, actually. I have to say, though, that I was very worried that so few people appeared to know the National Speed Limits. I don't know what's worse, not knowing them and driving too fast or knowing them and deliberately not adhering to them. One of the first polls done on the day was about how dangerous people thought "marginal speeding" was. Just a couple of miles an hour over a speed limit increases your stopping distance, decreases the margin of error for reaction times and increases the likelihood of a mishap becoming something far more serious. It really is a matter of life or death. And no matter how desperate and extreme that might sound, it's true. Speed does kill. (Alright, for those of you who are pedantic enough, it's the metal, plastic, concrete and tarmac that kill you, but try falling over on it, rather than being hurled at it!)

My understanding of road conditions is more immediate now, it's more conscious. I have, in the past, commentated on my view from behind the wheel or on the bike, talking through what I'm seeing. But I've only ever done it as an exercise. It's a really good one to do, too, constantly reviewing what you can see, what might affect you, the hazards, distractions and road furniture. All of it. I just haven't CONSCIOUSLY taken it all in for a very long time. It's well worth doing.

I could have taken a very dim view of all of this. I could have decided that it was 4 hours that I'll never get back, that I knew it all anyway. Of course I did. That's why I was there, obviously, because I knew it all already! As it was, I became aware that I was learning how to use my skills more appropriately, how to better evaluate conditions and the driving environment. How to be a better, more considerate, more capable and more aware driver. It all began to feel as though I was investing in my future as a motorist rather than being punished for breaking the law.

I'm not going to go all bombastic and start shouting that I've seen the light, but I've come away from it all with the very certain belief that, actually, every driver should take this course. No matter how condescending or patronising any individual may think it is, they couldn't be more wrong and it would be very worthwhile. If it saves lives, calms drivers, reduces congestion (or at least keeps increasing levels of traffic moving) makes roads safer and more pleasurable places to be it has to be a good thing. Save the speed for where it's safest. Go to a race track. Pay your pounds to the guys there, rather than putting anyone else at risk and potentially costing yourself a whole lot more by doing it on the public road.

I am a convert. And if you're stuck behind someone doing the speed limit, just take a breath, slow down and give a little space and maybe, just maybe, you'll come away with a better awareness of what's going on around you. It took the threat of prosecution, some money I could ill-afford to spend on it and 4 hours on a course for me to learn what I should already have known. Imagine how much easier it would be if you could do that in the comfort of your own car, just by watching the road a bit more carefully.

If you're still sceptical about the benefits of this course here are a few numbers. Over 195,000 people were injured as a result of road accidents in 2012. Of those, more than 23,000 were serious (e.g. involving broken bones) and 1700 people died. In a quarter of the total number of accidents speed was a factor. That's pretty bad. Now consider who you share the road with; other cars, vans, lorries, buses, bikes, motorbikes, pedestrians. And now think who those people are.  They're not just "other" people, they're mums, dads, sisters, brothers, sons, daughters, girlfriends, boyfriends, husbands, wives, friends, family. Give them a name. Give them their names. They're your friends, your family. And now consider your life if they weren't there. If you make it personal it becomes even more difficult to turn away from it and think, it's okay, it's only me and it won't happen to me anyway. I'm not saying it will. But hey, if we all take our foot off the gas and become more aware of the speed we do, the limits of the road and our own skills, then maybe, just maybe, we won't have to worry about that anymore.

There are various courses that you can do that are not a legal requirement but that will enhance your enjoyment of driving and make you safer and more aware. You can find out a lot of it via your local council and police force websites as well as the national ones. (www.gov.uk) And if you want track advice, check out the reviews on www.motorbikestoday.com and search online for companies who organise track days.

Stay safe out there and just COAST along (Concentrate, Observe, Anticipate, give yourself Space and Time)

Cheers y'all.

M